Death Cafe – Discussing Death
Most people avoid talking about death, which is why so few adults follow through with end-of-life planning. A visit to a “death cafe” can help change that attitude.
A Death Cafe is not an actual place, and is not set in any particular location. Instead, a death cafe is an event where individuals gather with “no agenda, objectives, or themes” to thoughtfully discuss death. According to the group’s website, “at a Death Cafe people, often strangers, gather to eat cake, drink tea and discuss death.” The object of the death cafe is “to increase awareness of death with a view to helping people make the most of their (finite) lives.”
Death Cafes are what organizers describe as a “social franchise,” and can be readily adapted and used by anyone interested in hosting one. As a non-profit organization, Death Cafes began through the volunteer work of Jon Underwood and Sue Barsy Reid.
Who Invented the Death Cafe?
The Death Cafe began in the UK in 2011, hosted by Underwood and Reid, who were inspired by the ideas of Bernard Crettaz. A year later, the first Death Cafe was held in the United States. As of 2025, Death Cafes had spread across the globe to more than 90 countries, with over 21,305 cafes held. It was just one year after the U.S. launch of death cafes began that the term “death positive” was used for that movement toward normalizing conversations about death.
How Do You Start a Death Cafe?
While similar in some ways to themed “cafes” such as café philosophiques (philosophy cafe), cafe churches, or your local cat cafe, a Death Cafe aims to inspire people to join together in discussion about death. Anyone can start a Death Cafe. A Death Cafe will need:
- A host and facilitator
- A venue for engagement (often a library or other nonprofit location)
- Refreshments (drinks and cake per tradition)
- People interested in talking about death
Death cafes are not counseling sessions, informational lectures, or a form of community engagement. These events are held with the main goal of learning and sharing about different views on death. These conversations, in turn, can spark action toward planning for the future.
Death cafes must be held:
- On a not-for-profit basis
- In an accessible, respectful, and confidential space
- With no intention of leading people to any conclusion, product, or course of action
- Alongside refreshing drinks and nourishing food – and cake!
The group offers this guide on hosting.
How Death Cafes Open Healthy Conversation
Talking about death is not an easy topic. Losing a loved one is one of the hardest things a person can go through. At a Death Cafe, its attendees embrace the finality of life and its inevitability. Rather than ignoring the conversation, the Death Cafe attempts to reduce that anxiety and the taboo around the subject.
How Tulip Helps with Planning
If you are making plans for your loved one or yourself, or if you need immediate service, Tulip Cremation offers simple, affordable direct cremations. Thinking about death can be a heavy subject, but working together, we can help you through the process. Our Family Care Team is available 24/7 at (844) 942-4909 or arrange online anytime on our website.